Open Discussion Question

How can women effectively use power to influence politics and policy making?

Conclusion

Some Topics Covered:
What kind of power women use
How women use their power
Expert power vs. Turf power
How gestures and comments undermine power
Why it is important how we use our power to help other women
How to balance family,work, and power
Workplace relationships
Professional differences between men and women

Family/Work Balance

Q: What can you do to establish your base as a powerful successful woman? What are good practices?

~Balance is a myth. You have to be really certain about what is important for you and what will work for you. Find an organization that will accommodate your needs. Look for a place that values you as a professional and trusts your decision making. If you need to revise your schedule, find a place that will acknowledge your need for flexibility. Also, it is important that other people in your life understand your priorities.

Q: Do you tell your employer about possible life changes?

~ NO! You don't know what is going to happen. You'll never hear a man saying "I might have to delay my professional goals".

~ I have daily deadlines and I have a young daughter and it's very difficult. Find a place that fits what you want. My interests changed after I got married. The work that I do means more to me than my position.

~Here is a very important piece. Be conscious of the decision that you are going to make. Too often women let that happen as opposed to being in control of the decision.

~As a man, I encourage women to spend a lot of time with their kids. There are a lot of problems that stem from not having enough face time with kids.

Professional Relationships

Q: Do women have a hard time distinguishing professional and personal relationships?

~I think it is a very hard distinction to make. Women have to be willing to take risks.

~Men are just as guilty, if not more guilty of letting male friends off the hook.

~As a woman, I don't make personal relationships with my colleagues.

~You have to make decisions about what activities you will be part of when you want to progress professionally.

Q: What do you think of "multiple identities" to keep things straight between professional and personal relationships?

~I will use my nickname at home and with my friends and my full name at work.

~Women are good at building relationships with one another and engaging in interesting activities. For example, women I work with get together and have a shoe shopping party.

~If people like you, you are more likely to get what you want.

Q: Do women in power seek out other women to work with/for them?

~I will look for whoever can get the job done.

~I will look for females or other minorities.

~Depending on the mission of the organization, hiring women can be really beneficial.

Women's Use of Power

Q: How do women act? How do we deploy our power?

~For a while I didn't feel that I could use my power to help women. I didn't want to get labeled as the woman who points out sexism in the workplace. That has definitely changed for me. There are time continuum's for power usage. I feel like I have been around long enough that I will point out sexism.

~Women learn diplomacy. They learn to play each other.

Q: Is there is a shift or maturation in how you use your power in the workplace?

~ There are allowable uses of power and times when I can use my power. I have matured in a way and now feel that I can raise important issues and that my power will not be threatened.

Q: How do you know when to call someone out for claiming ownership of your idea? What do we do when we are not getting credit for our hard work?

~It's more about the idea, not whose idea it is. But, at other times, you want ownership of an idea.

~You have to stand up for ownership of the idea and get proper compensation.

Q: How do we feel when women act powerless?

~As a male, I resent women who act cute to get their job done. My job is to make my boss look good and his job is to let me do my job well. I try to treat everyone equally and everyone should be nice, regardless of gender.

~ It's ok to use personality and looks to get ahead.

~ It's completely ok for women and men to use charm.

~I don't have to be self-conscious about my charm. The purposeful dumbing down by women is a very different act than using charm.

Q: Again, how much do men think about using charm?
~Men are covert in getting people to do what they want.

Differences Between Genders

Q: What are some differences between genders?

women always say "I'm sorry"
women say "I'm having a bad day"
women are called "energetic"
women are expected to smile a lot more than men
women are told that they look tired

Q: Do the men in the room feel unconditionally supported by the generation before them? Does this even register with men? Do men even think of this?

~So much of it is institutional culture. If your boss is extremely progressive that will affect all levels of management.

~In work places with male-dominated cultures the men have built in support network, but they don't think about it that way. Women have to seek each other out for support that is not inherent in the workplace.

Q: Do women work against each other instead of supporting each other?

~Often times women are the harder group to work with.

~Sometimes women are expected to be "flowery" in their conversation and email.

~We need to know how to respond to different people. My power comes from determining how to deal with people. People should never know when you like them.

Expertise

Q: What does it mean to be an expert in your job?

~ Sometimes lots of people are truly experts, but that does not mean that they will have power in their jobs.

~I was the only female working in an automotive job and I consistently had to prove myself to all groups despite the fact that I was the expert.

~ Power and Resources. Are they synonymous? There is often a big difference between being given the resources and being able to have the power?

~2 types of power exist: 1. position and 2. having the resources.

~The combination of being a young female professional makes it difficult to determine why I'm not getting the respect and/or response that I need.

Q: How does age factor into women and their use of power?

~I'm a teacher. When my principal saw me having confrontations with male students, the principal would jump in. This made me lose credibility with the students. And maybe the principal as a male thought that he was protecting me.

~It can be very difficult when men try to "protect" female colleagues because it often means a loss of power for women.

Q: Men, how do you feel about this?

~ Men don't talk about this kind of thing.

~Consensus building is the most important thing to do at work.

~ Men, sports, and work - women in these discussions need to stick around so that they don't miss out on important work conversations.